Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i think i have herpe
just one?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Randomize
