this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
