..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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