Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Houston, we have a blender
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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