so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
