$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You ate ashes out of my bong
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
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