He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
