I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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