screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
