9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
