Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
