Your face is a jimmy john
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Randomize
