When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize