I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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