I have demons in me.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
