whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
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