Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize