White coat. Heels.
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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