just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
