You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
4 words: hood of his car
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
