i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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