Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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