I think i peed on brittanys purse
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
