This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You are a genius and a whore.
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