I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Congratulations! We have a period
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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