Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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