I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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