Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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