I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
