he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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