Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize
