No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
im holly from the hills drunk
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I have already put on my inside pants.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
