i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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