Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
