if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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