ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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