idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
