very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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