what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
