Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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