just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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