my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
