Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
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