I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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