I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
