Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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