I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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