The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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