How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Randomize