Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
