his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
