he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
